Emotional intelligence is defined as being able to manage your own emotions and also understand the emotions of others.
Emotional intelligence consists of the five following sub-elements: empathy, self-awareness, motivation, self-regulation, and social skills.
Achievement in life can be hard to quantify if it does not fit into the matrix of what society believes is general intelligence. For most people, intelligence is measured through outward success in fields like academia, politics, law, mathematics, psychology and more. While this is true, it is not the full picture especially when it comes to looking at how emotional intelligence meaning affects success and leadership.
As society evolves and younger generations even coin buzzwords like ‘woke’ emotional intelligence meaning, for all of its nuances, is an important concept to understand. Today, most will agree that feelings and emotions are uncomfortable to wrestle with which is why character traits that make up emotional intelligence are seen to be worth cultivating.
Unfortunately, these traits do not come naturally to everyone, however if you want to experience and show signs of emotional intelligence, there are ways to develop it.
If you are looking for an emotional intelligence definition, keep reading because in this article, the question: what is emotional intelligence, or what is an EQ, will be answered. But before we look at what is an EQ, why would you want it?
There are many reasons why you may want to develop your EQ. From becoming a better leader to knowing how to navigate your emotions with maturity, the good news is that emotional intelligence can be acquired.
There are many reasons why you may be seeking to improve your emotional intelligence, whether that’s so that you can be a better leader or process emotional situations better. On the whole, signs of emotional intelligence are varied and broad which makes it an in-depth topic to navigate.

Don’t miss our guide on EQ basics!
What is an EQ and Can You Develop It?
So what is an EQ?
If you are looking for an emotional intelligence definition, you will find that most of them will contain concepts of individuals who have self-awareness and empathy. Emotional intelligence belongs to those who don’t see the world in black and white but are prepared to navigate the nuances and greys in between. One emotional intelligence definition could include describing someone who is able to “read a room.”
If developing your emotional or social intelligence is important to you, a good place to start would be to take a test to measure your emotional ability. The most popular paid test is the MSCEIT, however, there are plenty of free tests online to take advantage of too.
Are Self Control and Awareness Part of an Emotional Intelligence Definition?
Everyone accepts the importance and viability of measuring a quotient in general intelligence, however, some people do not feel the need to look for signs of emotional intelligence.
If you are keen to know how the importance of emotions, social awareness and self-management can positively impact job performance, there are numerous resources and articles to help you with your research.
Some of the work that is worth checking out is by psychologists Peter Salovey, David Caruso and John Mayer.
How to Develop Emotional Intelligence
Once you understand emotional intelligence meaning, where do you go from there in order to develop it?
You could start by reading Daniel Goleman’s bestseller and move onto the work of other authors and academics who expound on the attributes and signs of emotional intelligence.
In asking the question, what is emotional intelligence, you may need to dig.
Unlike the abundance of information available to develop IQ or general intelligence, people are not generally taught critical skills like how to self-regulate, empathise or manage emotions.
It also does not help that the superiority of high IQ is constantly reinforced and also rewarded. Nevertheless, displaying signs of emotional intelligence will have its rewards in every aspect of life that, here are some ways to develop it.

1. Listening and Watching: Expand Your Musical and Movie Repertoire
In answering the question what is emotional intelligence, one needs to look at the kind of content that we are tuning into. There are many studies that reveal that watching films or listening to music have a profound effect on our emotions. From observing body language and tone of voice, to listening to lyrics, art and media can have a profound effect on how we will convey our own signs of emotional intelligence.
Taking these concepts further is possible through activities like script writing or joining music programmes which can further boost the development of empathy.
2. Reading Books or Writing
The influence of reading on emotion is undisputed.
Studies have shown that reading books has the powerful ability to increase emotional intelligence. Even those who are not avid readers who can set themselves a goal to read one book per year, will experience a feeling of emotional development.
In the same way, it is possible for writing to improve your capacity to handle emotion. It is well known that people who have experienced various degrees of trauma can benefit greatly from the cathartic act of writing. Daily writing to begin or end a day can help to develop emotional range that will benefit all areas of your life. In so doing, you are likely to pick up both healthy and unhealthy thought patterns or habits. It is only through being aware of these that personal growth and emotional development can begin to take place.
If you are still wondering what is an EQ, read these further tips to develop emotional intelligence.
3. Exercise or Join a Sports Team
Participating in groups and teams is a sure way to develop personal growth because you will have to consider others and not only think of yourself. If you are an active person, one way to do this would be to join a sports team or exercise group. Besides the benefits of group participation for developing your emotional intelligence, consistent exercise is important for stress reduction as well as cultivating a positive attitude for life.
4. Practising Mindfulness
The meaning of mindfulness is diverse, however in general it means the process of taking mental and physical stock of your life and attempting to improve it where necessary. For instance, if you battle to sleep at night it could be that your brain simply won’t cannot shut down because there is underlying anxiety in your life.
To help pinpoint what these stress-inducing aspects are, mindfulness meditation or breathing exercises can be very helpful. To follow are some questions that could help you to better understand your emotions.
- Do your experiences drastically affect your emotions? And do your emotions fluctuate from moment to moment, or not really?
- Can you identify and link emotions to sensations in your body? If so, where do they happen. For instance, is there tightness in your throat or chest, clenching in your jaw, nausea in your stomach or dizziness in your head?
- Do you find that people tend to be confused by how you are feeling because your emotional responses are not identifiable? Alternatively, are your emotional reactions intense?
- How much of a role do you allow your emotional responses to play in your decision making?
By answering questions like these, you can begin to understand and process your emotions.

Recommended Online Help for Improving Social Skills
Having the desire to learn more about yourself and growing your emotional awareness is already a positive sign when it comes to emotional maturity. Apart from sessions with a life coach or psychologist there are numerous resources on EQ available on and offline to help you delve into your fascinating inner world.
- Being Well podcast: listen to Rick Hanson's interviews with emotional health professionals on some of the many ways you can grow and develop your mental skills for a happier, and healthier life.
- Take an emotional intelligence test online