Have You Heard of Cyberbullying?

While technology and the internet do provide us with multiple reasons to be grateful, the ease at which communication is a possibility and the anonymity associated with creating an online presence means that negative behaviour is just as easy to spot online as well.

Not only are we staying in touch with our friends quicker than before, but we are also staying in touch with complete strangers who could be toying with our emotions and making us feel more self-conscious.

If Season 3 of Slasher taught us anything it is that any form of cyberbullying can have very devastating consequences for everyone involved. It also taught us to be very careful about what it is that we decide to post. Without even thinking about it, a post that you chose to send to someone in the form of a comment or a message may be hurting someone else to the extent that you are seen as the cyberbully. Always put yourself in the other person's shoes before you chose to post something that is not so nice. Also, remember that what you chose to post stays online forever. It is impossible to delete a message or an email that was sent.

While it is important not to become a cyberbully, you also need to stop yourself from becoming a victim of cyberbullying. If you know that a friend or family member is being bullied online, you in to step in and help him or her as well.

In this blog post, we will look at the meaning of cyberbullying, the ways and signs to spot instances of cyberbullying, and ways to prevent falling prey to the cyberbullies lurking online.

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Help for Cyberbullying in South Africa

Cyberbullying is the act of harassing, intimidating or attempting to humiliate someone using digital platforms, like social media, messaging apps, or gaming.

Unlike face-to-face bullying, cyberbullying can take place 24/7, and is often anonymous. The offensive comments or harmful images or videos shared can unfortunately spread rapidly and remain online indefinitely.

Cyberbullying can have a severe and lasting impact on the target. Victims of cyberbullying can develop anxiety, self-esteem problems, and even depression.

Cyberbullying is such a serious issue that you are urged to communicate with The Department of Justice and Constitutional Development as well as the South African Police Services if you are being cyberbullied and the bullying gets out of hand. So much emphasis is placed on not tolerating cyberbullying in South Africa that multiple brochures have been created on the issue.

The reason why the emphasis is placed on not cyberbullying is because it can have devastating consequences for both the victim and sometimes even for the bully as well.

Cyberbullies (depending on the extent of the bullying) may be charged with:

• criminal defamation
• assault
• extortion.

Notice the online signs of cyberbullying in order to prevent the bullying from happening to your or to someone that you love.

Discovering The Meaning of Cyberbullying

To know if you are being cyberbullied, you need to know exactly what cyberbullying is and what this type of bullying entails. Cyberbullying refers to the abuse of technology in order to perform acts with malicious intent. 

Cyberbullying basically means hurting someone emotionally through text messages, private messages on social media platforms, emails, or even phone calls.

Social media bullying is the most common form of bullying; however, cyberbullying is not limited to one digital platform. A text message that contains nasty threats or insults is also a form of cyberbullying.

The series, "Pretty Little Liars," showed us that bullying can happen anonymously as well. Cyberbullying can happen in the form of harmful messages or even when someone sends malicious videos, and photos with the intention of causing damage to a person's reputation.

The scary part of cyberbullying is that there is no way you can escape it since you are always surrounded by technology. Your phone is always switched on, so a hurtful message will find its way to your eyes in no time.

Anonymity is another reason why people chose to bully. Hiding behind the screen and taking on a new identity could mean that it is far easier to hurt someone or say nasty things to someone.

Cyberbullying can also happen without anyone knowing that it is happening. The anonymity issue even makes it hard to know who exactly is bullying you. A bully may have created a fake profile and the true identity of the bully may not be revealed. It is hard to know who is sitting behind the computer screen.

Don’t worry though, if you know someone is being cyber bullied, there are plenty of things that you can do to help them. Even if you haven’t experienced cyberbullying before, it’s useful to know how to act in a cyberbullying situation in case you have to deal with it one day.

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Effects of Cyberbullying

The cyberbullying incidences may make the victim feel helpless and may also mess with the victim's emotional health. If cyberbullying happens all too often, the person may be inclined to change his or her habits online.

For one, a person who feels that his or her reputation is being affected online may resort to checking his or her phone or email all too often. Waiting for a text message to arrive before it comes is even an effect of cyberbullying.  Checking your phone all too often, or jumping every time you hear the message tone for an SMS or social media direct message is also an effect of cyberbullying.

You must remember that if you are being bullied via text messages or the email on your phone, you may find that your phone safety may be compromised as well.

Shifty behaviour such as a reluctance to talk about social media in general or even reluctance to share online activity could be an effect of cyberbullying. The person feels like he or she cannot disclose what he or she is going through. Like with any form of bullying, the victim usually choses to suffer the consequences of bullying alone. 

Inevitably, the effects of cyberbullying could make the victim seem hurt, anxious, and may even make the person consider hurting himself or herself.

Signs of Cyberbullying

The effects of cyberbullying can surely be drastic, but what are the signs that someone is being cyberbullied?  You may also help yourself to identify if you are being cyberbullied or not. Knowing the signs of cyberbullying surely does help you to battle against the bully and against the negative emotions associated with being bullied.

Showcasing Negative Emotion

Cyberbullying can be noticed when a person showcases many negative emotions. Anxiety, fear, shame, or even hurt that shows up on a person's face after he or she uses technology is a sign of cyberbullying.

If you feel awfully unhappy after using your own social media or someone's comment or message made you feel fear, hurt, or shame, you may be cyberbullied as well.

Social media and messages are not meant to make you feel worse about yourself, your body image, or even your self-confidence. Remember when scrolling through social media pages,  look for pages that make you feel happier and not uncomfortable.  You know you are winning on social media if you feel happier after using Instagram or Facebook.

Physical Manifestation of Cyberbullying

If someone tends to feel nauseated or gets headaches after using social media, he or she may be cyberbullied. It is harder to notice these physical signs on someone else.

However, you will know that you are affected by a person on your social media or an email contact if you are feeling sick after reading or seeing a message from that person.

Using social media so excessively that you feel tired always is another sign of cyberbullying. There should be no reason why you push yourself to stay online when someone is forcing you to do so by sending you horrible messages or blackmailing you to stay online. 

Giving Up Parts of Yourself or Changing Yourself

A person who is being bullied online may chose to drop doing something they love or even wish to change in order to change the hurt that they feel due to comments or statements made by the social media bully.

If you feel the need to change yourself due to what someone else is telling you online, you may be experiencing cyberbullying in its ripest form.

Changing The Narrative

If you are being bullied online, you would want someone to be there for you to help you through it. If someone else that you know is being bullied, you may want to step in and be their shoulder to cry on.

Create a Safe Space

Technology may be a source of stress for the person who is being bullied. Hence create a safe space where you can help them to keep their mind off having to check their phone every two seconds.

You can offer support, allow them to express how they are feeling, and provide guidance as where they can get help.

Sometimes all it takes is for the victim to realise they can delete or block the bully and move on. 

It may be a good idea to discuss general online safety too!

Report it

Feel free to report the accounts of social media bullies to the social media site. You may help someone to delete or block an online bully and move on, however, you may be leaving the door open for the bully to harm someone else emotionally.

Consider reading our Safety on Social Media guide.

Always keep in mind, "Being a bully on the internet is a sign of insecurity and weakness."  Rev Run. Therefore, the internet bully doesn't have the upper hand over you, you have the upper hand over the insecure and weak bully.